Late To School (Again)


I laughed at a first grader who knocked over a row of bikes this morning. She was late to school, walking her bike the last few steps before parking it in front of the principal’s office.  “Come ON!” her mom begged.  “The bell just rang!”  Their footsteps tapped along the sidewalk in a familiar, choreographed dance.  I was on the last eight-count of my own uncoordinated morning performance, having nudged and prodded and rushed my five year old into his kindergarten class just seconds before. I had already walked past Little Miss Tardy when I heard the crash.  Caught up in the rush of the morning, she had flung her bike into the carefully arranged line of bright colored handlebars and

28 Days Of Play: Love Comes Crashing In


“Hiiiiiiiii-YAAAAAAAAAA” he yells, as he careens around the corner, pops up onto the back of the couch, and catapults himself into my lap on the living room floor. A tangle of wiry, thin 5 year old limbs collide with mine as I try to catch him, my arms instinctively wrapping around his back to brace his fall. My voice leaves my body before I can think to stop it. “MAX!” I yell! “Be careful!” He looks up at me with wide eyes, that quickly dissolve into a furrowed brow. “I’m sorry, Mommy.” he mumbles. “I was just trying to….”. And I cut him off. “It’s ok. You’re not in trouble. You just need to warn me before you do that, so that you don’t hurt my body….or yours.” And then, from the other

How Are Those Resolutions Treating You?


15 Ways To Lose Weight in the New Year!  10 Ways That I Will Be A More Present Mother in 2015!  479 Tips To Shedding The Pounds and Shedding The Shame! Well Happy New Year, parents everywhere.  If the magazine covers and the Facebook posts don't have you feeling terrible about yourself, then perhaps you haven't been paying attention. January 1st is no longer a new beginning, it's a deadline.  Don't think that you can hide behind your cart full of cute PJ's and juice boxes in the Target checkout line.  The tabloid magazines know you're there.  You might be so sleep-deprived that you don't realize you've spilled your latte on last pregnancy's maternity pants, but you can still (barely)

Complications Of Motherhood


  Thrilled to be published on Mamalode this month, talking about whether or not we exist beyond our children. There are goldfish crackers ground into your carpet. There is a small streak of peanut butter on the side of your sofa that matches the height of a toddler who just earned the right to walk around while he eats his snack. Who am I kidding? He won't sit in the high chair anymore, and the only way you can convince him to eat is to let him walk around with a smashed sandwich in his hand. There are exactly 247 Legos scattered across your 5-year-old's bedroom, none of which are the exact ones he is looking for when he's yelling through the bathroom door that "the little blue

10 Ways That C-Sections and Vaginal Births Are Exactly The Same


Disclaimer:  If I use the word "vagina" in the title of a post, consider that your warning about skipping this one if you yourself do not own a vagina.   For many women, birth either involves an actual human getting pushed out of your vagina, or an actual human getting pulled from your womb through an honest to goodness operation.  That you are most likely awake for. Yes, babies are "supposed" to be born through the appropriate exit door.  I am well aware of the statistics that show how care providers coerce women into c-sections, and urge complacency so that women do not advocate for themselves as they birth.  Not every woman who has a c-section "needs" one, regardless of what your

5 Ways To Improve Elementary School


Dear School District, I know that it's only been a week since my son started Kindergarten, but I was hoping to share a few ideas with you.  Unlike those helicopter parents who elbow their way into the principal's office on Day 3 to give "constructive feedback", I wanted to make sure that I really understood how things worked before reaching out to you.  It's Day 7, and as a seasoned public school veteran now, I'm hoping that my outline of district-wide improvements will be well-received. Here are a few important ways that you can improve the public elementary school experience for all of the families in our community: 1.  Mandatory public school for toddlers.  So here's the thing.

Dear New Kindergarten Mom


Dear New Kindergarten Mom, This morning, I bundled my boys into the stroller and went out for one last impromptu morning walk. Max will be starting kindergarten next week, and the days spent hanging out in our jammies and meandering to the nearest park or Starbucks are almost over. My best friend texted me a picture of her own 5-year-old a few minutes later, standing in front of his new elementary school. "How did we get here?!" I texted back. It was yesterday that we were pregnant together. Visiting the fire station with toddlers together. Welcoming second babies together. "How did we get here?!" Well, Mama, I want you to take a break from packing lunches and tucking pencils into