How On Earth??

There are a few things that I’m starting to have trouble with…for instance, HOW DO I:

1. Wash my face at the sink when I can’t bend over any more? There is water ALL over the bathroom when I finish.

2. Shave my legs?? Ok…this isn’t completely impossible yet (and thank god it isn’t summer skirt weather), but that day will come…and on that day, perhaps I will have a new shower with a little ledge or a place to sit 🙂

3. Sleep through the night? Between the waking up to pee, and the maneuvering the “body pillow” as I toss and turn, I’m surprised that Sean hasn’t spent more nights in the living room. Add to this the fact that I am incredibly parched ALL THE TIME, and my nights go like this: get arranged next to the body pillow, get all the covers on top of me AND the body pillow without stretching my body in ways it doesn’t stretch anymore, close my eyes, try to make my breathing go back to normal, feel the baby kick, realize I have to pee, get up, stumble to the bathroom and trip over Rylee because I have no sense of balance any more, pee, realize I HAVE TO have a drink of water, gulp down some water, go back to bed, trip over Rylee again, get arranged next to the body pillow, get all the covers on top of me……you get the picture, right? This happens over AND over AND over.

4. Wash the dishes? Ok…so I don’t do this ALL that often 🙂 But when I do, my belly hits the sink, so I have to turn to the side, which means I can’t get a good grip on the pots and pans, which means….that really I shouldn’t be washing dishes to begin with, right?!

5. Get in and out of the car? Especially Sean’s car. There is nothing lady-like or cute about boosting myself out of the gopher hole that is Sean’s two-seater sports car.

6. Stay awake for a full day of work? Around 3:30 I realize that I just….don’t….care….any…..more. And when I walked to my car after work today, I actually noticed that there were some lush green low bushes in front of the office next door and thought to myself “If I was a homeless person, I would TOTALLY sleep there.” WHAT??!

7. Remember things?? I opened the kitchen cabinet tonight and then stared at it blankly. I could not for the life of me remember why I opened it. I will have a thought at work, go to find something on my computer to complete that task, and then completely forget what I was intending to do. And it’s not just that I get side-tracked, it’s that my mind goes 100% blank and I stare into the darkness.

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